attached

Too hard on the brakes again
What if these brakes just give in?
What if they don't get out of the way?
What if there's someone overtaking?
I'm going out for a little drive
And it could be the last time you see me alive
There could be an idiot on the road
The only kick in life is pumping his steel

Wrap me up in the back of the trunk
Packed with foam and blind drunk
They won't ever take me alive
'Cause they all drive...

Don't die on the motorway
The moon would freeze, the plants would die
I couldn't cope if you crashed today
All the things I forgot to say
I'm going out for a little drive
And it could be the last time you see me alive
What if the car loses control?
What if there's someone overtaking?

--killer cars, radiohead

My lolo died on this day, oct. 4. a case of hit and run (if i haven't mentioned).
Around this time last year, our family has just been dumbstruck,
right when my lolo's heartbeat went zero. The elders didn't push with his revival.
And I was sort of asking myself if everyone in our family have a weak faith to begin with or

...did our faith got weak because of him?

everything's a mess ever since he left. His wife acts more grumpy and pessimistic than ever and everyone in the family tends to either be influenced by her gloomy nature or remain shut up about it. Their house gives off this certain sadness everytime I visit, telling me that something's empty. I'm left with thoughts of him.

If we pushed through with reviving him, is it possible that he'd still be alive today?

I guess it really is hard missing someone you know will never come back.
***
Dj says he envy dead people. Sometimes, I envy them too.